Gone gone gone, I've been gone too long...

Hello there everyone. Anyone. Someone. These past several months have been very challenging. I've been struggling with arthritis pain. The severe weather changes have been a major factor, I'm sure. I'm looking forward to more stable conditions outside so I can feel better on the inside. 

I'll be randomly updating more soon. But tonight I'm exhausted from work and the Xanax is kicking my ass. Sleep will be much welcomed. I've not had a lot of that lately either. 

Peace and prayers my lovelies. 

T. 

No Work, No Fun, No Email, No SLEEP!

Tonight wasn't so bad at work.  Probably because the craps table stood dead pretty much the whole time.  I did take an E.O. even though I told myself I wouldn't.  It was slow anyway.  And I wasn't  physically up to dealing the tub for 4 hours.  It may have really done me in.  I want to feel good tomorrow.  It's Kristy's birthday and we have plans.  I took the night off so we can enjoy her day.  She and I are doing some shopping tomorrow during the day and I'll take her out to lunch.  I do treasure alone time with the girls as they are getting older.  It's precious.

I'm having issues with my yahoo mail account.  It wouldn't let me sign in.  It said my account had been comprised or something so I had to call to reset my password.  I couldn't do it online.  So I called the number.  There was a 30 minute wait.  Awesome.  I waited; not so patiently; and at exactly 29 minutes there was a series of clicks on the line and I was disconnected.  Seriously.  I called back.  After 19 minutes I got the same thing.  I called back.  Busy tone.  I called back again and got the message that due to the high volume of calls mine could not be answered.  Please try again later.  Can you say 'irritated'??? So I am still unable to get my emails and I still don't have a clue why.  Nice....

Now as I sit here and tell myself I should be sleeping, I know my mind isn't going to be easy to shut down tonight.  Maybe I'll play a little 'Words With Friends'... lol  Night All.

Fingers, Feet, Hips and Shoulders

After the past four days of totally overdoing it, I'm paying dearly with painful hands, bottoms of my feet, screaming hips and sore shoulders.  I've decided to listen to my body today and just rest before I go in to work tonight.  It's probably a little too little, a little too late.  I hate living on Vicodin and Flexeril.  I know I hate it, yet I push my body to my limits and expect not to have to take them.  Blonde.  I swear.

The up side is the rental unit is all but finished! Some light cleaning that my girls can do is left, along with some tile work that their dad is going to take care of for me.  Now to get it rented... Please, God, please. I can't continue to carry it much longer.

Tomorrow is Kristy's 21st birthday.  Where did that time go? I have no more minors for children - lol.

I still have 11 days to go until my next Rhuemy appt.  I'm anxious and nervous.  She's almost certain I'm suffering from both Lupus and RA.  If that's the case, then I wonder what treatment course will begin from there??

My demon dog decided that it was nap time so I got to use the home computer for a change.  He is SO high
maintenance.  It's a good thing he's cute.  See what I mean?

Monday Madness

It's going to be a crazy day!  I've been up and out already.  Trip to the post office and gas station are done.  I'm noticing that my hands, knees and hips are really sore today.  Probably from helping my sister move yesterday.  I always pay for overdoing it.  In about 20 minutes I'm going to tour a home that's up for sale.  I'd love to get out of my own rental property and in to a home of my own.  I'm excited to go look at it, but I'm also very down to earth when it comes to purchases.  When car shopping it takes me months.  It's already been over a year and a half of house hunting.  Who knows when I'll find the perfect place, perfectly priced, that perfectly satisfies me.  It may well be that last house I ever buy.  I can be picky if I want.

Later I'm cleaning the basement up in the rental apartment if I have time.  The painter is finished, the grouting in the kitchen is done, and almost done in the bathroom.  The carpet guy started last night.  The end is NEAR!!!  Yea!

The casino where I work is having a 'Trunk or Treat' tonight.  Obviously my own kids are too old for this, but I'm taking my 5 year old niece.  Gracie will have such a good time.  She gets to dress up and trick or treat all my friends/co-workers.

I'm planning on just throwing together a pot of chili for us for dinner.  It can simmer in the crock pot while we are at the event at the casino.  Between my body aches and my busy schedule today, I doubt if I feel like making a masterpiece tonight.

Peace to you all.

Gone To Long

I've been gone from my blog way too long.  It's been a crazy been couple of weeks.  Between my mother's doctors appointments and my own, renovating an apartment, and work, I have had little time to myself.  Plus the weather has turned colder and my bones and joints have definitely noticed the difference.

I lost a friend last week to cancer.  Her fight was strong.  She was a little soldier.  Deb fought through heart attacks, colon cancer, liver issues.  In the end her faith was strong.  She lived her life.  I went to her funeral mass last Monday and it urged me to get back to church myself.  Here's the kicker - I got up this morning, got dressed, drove the 10 miles to the Catholic church I used to attend at the time it always had been, and I was 2 hours late.  Ha ha.  God is testing me to see how strong my resolve is.  I read on the board outside that Mass is scheduled for Tuesday morning at 8.  That may be doable, if not, I will be there next Sunday at 8 am - NOT 10.

The visit with the Rhuemy went okay.  I get all my test results and xrays back in a couple of weeks.  I'm both excited and nervous.  I do want to know whats going on inside my own body, but then when I really do KNOW, I have to truly face it.  I know this makes sense to those of you with RA.

For now I have to hurry on.  My sister is moving today and I have to help with what I can.  I promise to be back soon.  Maybe I'll have followers soon...?  Maybe not.  To those of you reading -keep the faith, enjoy the good days, and laugh or at least smile through the bad.

Managing Times Three

Managing X 1
   Monday's visit to the doctor went as expected I suppose.  Dr. Miller answered a few of my questions and set me up with a Rhuemy doctor for next Monday.  I'm both excited and scared to go.  For those of you with RA, you understand.  Dr. Miller did recommend I stay on all my meds for now.  The list didn't grow though, so for that I am thankful.  He had taken me off Prednisone last visit.  I hate that stuff.  After the visit I did some errands and returned home.  Changed my clothes and went over to the empty rental apartment to survey the damages. So Monday I managed my schedule, my doctor, and my pain pretty well.

Managing X 2
   The rental that I'm beginning work on was left in such a mess that it will literally take me at least this entire month to clean up and renovate before I can even think about putting another tenant in there.  I don't enjoy losing money and I enjoy even less cleaning up after someone that was SO dirty.  I can't imagine living that way.  I won't go in to extreme detail because it's just that bad.  When I learned of the way she was living, I inspected her.  That was 2 months ago.  I expressed my concern and gave her a month to clean up.  I inspected again and it was still terrible.  Animal feces on the floors, filthy kitchen, trash everywhere.  So I told her she had to be out by the end of the month.  Tuesday I began the daunting task of pulling off the trim boards and pulling up all the laminate flooring.  Breaks my heart.  The floor was so lovely when it went in.  But she damaged it beyond repair.  I've decided to put carpeting back in that unit.  I can't afford to go with wood laminate again anyway.  Between my anger and my OCD, once I started ripping out the floor, it was difficult to stop.  My hands, hips, legs, and shoulders started screaming at me after about 5 hours so I had to.  So Tuesday I managed my property well, but not my pain or my OCD...haha...

Managing X 3
   So, yesterday I was SO sore and in pain that I could do nothing.  I knew I had over done it on Tuesday working in that apartment.  But, I also have to get it done.  I go back to work tonight and won't have a chance to get back in there now until Sunday I'm sure.  Work takes so much out of me that I can't imagine I will feel well enough to rip out flooring, scrub down walls, or paint on those days.  Wednesday I managed to do nothing! Which is a huge achievement for me.

Family, Football and Fatigue

I worked almost 10 hours last night on Craps.  It was a decent game.  We did have one or two that basically kept us bent over the entire time so I was feeling the effects of that when I got up this morning.  I only slept about 3 hours.  That's about my average for Saturday night/Sunday morning rest.  I got up, dealt with Houdini and his needs, grabbed a cup of coffee and a bowl of cereal, then settled in for a little bit.  I was pretty sore.  My hands, feet, and shoulders ached.  And my legs were swollen.  Some things the meds just don't seem to be helping much.  This I will mention to my doctor tomorrow.  After a hot shower, Kayla and I went to my moms for lunch.  My brother was the only other one there today because Danyell was throwing Maelee a party for her 2nd birthday at 3.  We took Mom over with us after lunch.  I was definitely tired and hurting but the little ones make me so happy it just doesn't matter.  Maelee had such a good time too.  She is an adorable little girl.  We left about 5.  I did take a nap when I got home.  I just had too.  I hate sleeping that late in the day.  When I woke up I had a terrible pain in my right shoulder.  Great.  A new one.

My beloved Chiefs are now 5-0.  Who would have ever thought THAT? It's thrilling to see them finally doing well again.  My dad, I'm sure, is smiling down and raising one up for them today.

So, doctor appointment tomorrow.  We will be discussing the Rheumy he is recommending for sure.  And how my diet plan is working.  And pain levels.  Of course I have questions.  I always do.  It may or may not be time for the shots I get in my hips...love those...right.

I have had a rough couple of weeks, but I am recovering.  Mentally.  It's funny how it just smacks me right in the face some days.  I'm not a whiner, and I don't talk a lot about it with anyone.  Oh and I when I do I get the dreaded "You don't look sick" or "Arthritis isn't that bad anymore, right?" or "Are you THAT old?".  I've had a hard time adjusting.  That's where my room for improvement has to come in. So this is what I've got, but I'm not going to let it get me down.  Not every day anyway.  One day at a time.  Admit that I can't carry 10 bags of groceries at once anymore because my hands scream in pain...and that it's okay.  I can make an extra trip to the car.  Not a big deal.  I don't have to carry 2 kids on my hips anymore and balance all that.  The girls are grown.  They can help me.  Even if it is hard to ask. Learning to count my blessings in a different way.  Thank you God that I can move today with a minimum amount of pain.  Thank you God that I slept 4-5 hours in a row.  Thank you God.  And on super bad days - Thank you God that I have a support system that I can lean on.  I know others don't.  So stop being so damn stubborn and use it.  :)