The 1st Real Smack

Okay, so here's the photos of my ring finger on my left hand. Of course they don't 'show' pain. And they don't really show the disfigurement properly. I'm truly fighting the depression. The 1st real sign. 

Blog Failure

I stopped blogging. I don't know why. It's July now. I've been suffering a lot. Storming weather and humidity have been causing my joints severe pain. Today was a migraine day too. My family, while I think they try sometimes, still don't fully understand the daily struggle I face. Between the Lupus & the RA it can be quite depressing too. So I don't just struggle physically, but mentally as well. 

I'm finding more and more things that I can't eat anymore too. My doctors have warned me that my diet would change. I try to keep to healthier options, but I still love ice cream! I can't eat onions or cucumbers now. They upset my tummy to the point of terrible pain. Heavy creams or sauces are also a 'no go'. I'm happy that breakfast foods are still yummy and have no adverse affects on me. Yea! Milk does though. Being raised on a dairy farm - this is distressing. My ice cream option is Gelato. I get dairy milk from our local farm. And I use almond milk in my cereal and coffee. You figure things out through trial and error. 

Work is going okay. As long as I stay around 25-30 hours I'm good. More than 10 hour shifts are too much. And more than 30 hours a week and I'm down for 2 days. My scheduler & I are working it out. 

I'll be blogging more. I hope someone is reading. But even if not, it's suppose to be my therapy. 

Gone gone gone, I've been gone too long...

Hello there everyone. Anyone. Someone. These past several months have been very challenging. I've been struggling with arthritis pain. The severe weather changes have been a major factor, I'm sure. I'm looking forward to more stable conditions outside so I can feel better on the inside. 

I'll be randomly updating more soon. But tonight I'm exhausted from work and the Xanax is kicking my ass. Sleep will be much welcomed. I've not had a lot of that lately either. 

Peace and prayers my lovelies. 

T. 

No Work, No Fun, No Email, No SLEEP!

Tonight wasn't so bad at work.  Probably because the craps table stood dead pretty much the whole time.  I did take an E.O. even though I told myself I wouldn't.  It was slow anyway.  And I wasn't  physically up to dealing the tub for 4 hours.  It may have really done me in.  I want to feel good tomorrow.  It's Kristy's birthday and we have plans.  I took the night off so we can enjoy her day.  She and I are doing some shopping tomorrow during the day and I'll take her out to lunch.  I do treasure alone time with the girls as they are getting older.  It's precious.

I'm having issues with my yahoo mail account.  It wouldn't let me sign in.  It said my account had been comprised or something so I had to call to reset my password.  I couldn't do it online.  So I called the number.  There was a 30 minute wait.  Awesome.  I waited; not so patiently; and at exactly 29 minutes there was a series of clicks on the line and I was disconnected.  Seriously.  I called back.  After 19 minutes I got the same thing.  I called back.  Busy tone.  I called back again and got the message that due to the high volume of calls mine could not be answered.  Please try again later.  Can you say 'irritated'??? So I am still unable to get my emails and I still don't have a clue why.  Nice....

Now as I sit here and tell myself I should be sleeping, I know my mind isn't going to be easy to shut down tonight.  Maybe I'll play a little 'Words With Friends'... lol  Night All.

Fingers, Feet, Hips and Shoulders

After the past four days of totally overdoing it, I'm paying dearly with painful hands, bottoms of my feet, screaming hips and sore shoulders.  I've decided to listen to my body today and just rest before I go in to work tonight.  It's probably a little too little, a little too late.  I hate living on Vicodin and Flexeril.  I know I hate it, yet I push my body to my limits and expect not to have to take them.  Blonde.  I swear.

The up side is the rental unit is all but finished! Some light cleaning that my girls can do is left, along with some tile work that their dad is going to take care of for me.  Now to get it rented... Please, God, please. I can't continue to carry it much longer.

Tomorrow is Kristy's 21st birthday.  Where did that time go? I have no more minors for children - lol.

I still have 11 days to go until my next Rhuemy appt.  I'm anxious and nervous.  She's almost certain I'm suffering from both Lupus and RA.  If that's the case, then I wonder what treatment course will begin from there??

My demon dog decided that it was nap time so I got to use the home computer for a change.  He is SO high
maintenance.  It's a good thing he's cute.  See what I mean?

Monday Madness

It's going to be a crazy day!  I've been up and out already.  Trip to the post office and gas station are done.  I'm noticing that my hands, knees and hips are really sore today.  Probably from helping my sister move yesterday.  I always pay for overdoing it.  In about 20 minutes I'm going to tour a home that's up for sale.  I'd love to get out of my own rental property and in to a home of my own.  I'm excited to go look at it, but I'm also very down to earth when it comes to purchases.  When car shopping it takes me months.  It's already been over a year and a half of house hunting.  Who knows when I'll find the perfect place, perfectly priced, that perfectly satisfies me.  It may well be that last house I ever buy.  I can be picky if I want.

Later I'm cleaning the basement up in the rental apartment if I have time.  The painter is finished, the grouting in the kitchen is done, and almost done in the bathroom.  The carpet guy started last night.  The end is NEAR!!!  Yea!

The casino where I work is having a 'Trunk or Treat' tonight.  Obviously my own kids are too old for this, but I'm taking my 5 year old niece.  Gracie will have such a good time.  She gets to dress up and trick or treat all my friends/co-workers.

I'm planning on just throwing together a pot of chili for us for dinner.  It can simmer in the crock pot while we are at the event at the casino.  Between my body aches and my busy schedule today, I doubt if I feel like making a masterpiece tonight.

Peace to you all.

Gone To Long

I've been gone from my blog way too long.  It's been a crazy been couple of weeks.  Between my mother's doctors appointments and my own, renovating an apartment, and work, I have had little time to myself.  Plus the weather has turned colder and my bones and joints have definitely noticed the difference.

I lost a friend last week to cancer.  Her fight was strong.  She was a little soldier.  Deb fought through heart attacks, colon cancer, liver issues.  In the end her faith was strong.  She lived her life.  I went to her funeral mass last Monday and it urged me to get back to church myself.  Here's the kicker - I got up this morning, got dressed, drove the 10 miles to the Catholic church I used to attend at the time it always had been, and I was 2 hours late.  Ha ha.  God is testing me to see how strong my resolve is.  I read on the board outside that Mass is scheduled for Tuesday morning at 8.  That may be doable, if not, I will be there next Sunday at 8 am - NOT 10.

The visit with the Rhuemy went okay.  I get all my test results and xrays back in a couple of weeks.  I'm both excited and nervous.  I do want to know whats going on inside my own body, but then when I really do KNOW, I have to truly face it.  I know this makes sense to those of you with RA.

For now I have to hurry on.  My sister is moving today and I have to help with what I can.  I promise to be back soon.  Maybe I'll have followers soon...?  Maybe not.  To those of you reading -keep the faith, enjoy the good days, and laugh or at least smile through the bad.